tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3354761566702250657.post5375170410263667490..comments2024-03-29T06:49:04.530-07:00Comments on Infertile Phoenix: Still Skipping PartiesInfertile Phoenixhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11033358612204465661noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3354761566702250657.post-35265840495704488092017-09-14T22:41:36.282-07:002017-09-14T22:41:36.282-07:00Thank you so much for your comment and understandi...Thank you so much for your comment and understanding. I think my biggest worry was that my friend would be upset or wouldn't understand. Which, I would think, okay- just call her and talk it out. But schedules are hard these days, even for a phone conversation and, really, I just don't find my friends with children to be understanding right now. Maybe they will later. Maybe they're just in the moment with their kids right now. I don't know. It's okay. It's hard, but I don't totally fault them. My old friends and I live in a different world and theirs is the norm, so why would they know or need to understand my experience? But thank you. It's hard. I care about my friend and her kid so much. In one way, it was just a party. In another way, it was several more things. Infertility sucks. Infertile Phoenixhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11033358612204465661noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3354761566702250657.post-24682270095811696952017-09-14T18:52:39.684-07:002017-09-14T18:52:39.684-07:00It's okay to not go to the party. I'm with...It's okay to not go to the party. I'm with your husband, kids' parties aren't much fun for anyone but the kids (which is why my best friend who has 3 kids tries to get them to pick a "family experience" over a party every year). I don't go to kids parties, and I said no so many times I don't get invited anymore, which is okay. I send presents via the wonder of Amazon, usually books. You can spend time with your friend and her child separately, and it will be better quality time and you won't have to worry about being the only non-mom in a sea of momishness. Going when you're feeling sad and left out is miserable...better to replace it with some other thing with your friend and let go of the guilt on that one. Hopefully your friend is of the understanding sort, that always helps, too! Thinking of you, that's a tough situation.Jesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15868505568965284742noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3354761566702250657.post-1718858309815415342017-09-12T13:36:36.246-07:002017-09-12T13:36:36.246-07:00Thanks Mali. When I said I'd go to the party, ...Thanks Mali. When I said I'd go to the party, I thought I was at that point. But then the day came... And I wasn't. I was frustrated with myself and immediately thought the worst, like that it will ALWAYS be this way. But it won't. I remember how much changes for me from year to year. All I can do is honor and accept where I am in the moment. Thank you again. :)Infertile Phoenixhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11033358612204465661noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3354761566702250657.post-88468407982836752542017-09-11T22:19:13.773-07:002017-09-11T22:19:13.773-07:00Sometimes our husbands just sum it all up, don'...Sometimes our husbands just sum it all up, don't they?! <br /><br />I think you did what you needed to do at this time. It won't always be like this. But you shouldn't get upset at yourself for not being there yet. It takes time. <br /><br />And one-on-one, your friend gets your undivided attention, without the fear and loss that might have overwhelmed you at the party. So does your friend's child. And they also get your undivided attention in a one-on-one visit, which they'll remember and cherish too.Malihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03928262526502319303noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3354761566702250657.post-43028587590696985612017-09-11T09:50:10.902-07:002017-09-11T09:50:10.902-07:00That's exactly what I was thinking! I should s...That's exactly what I was thinking! I should see my friend one-on-one or in a small group, not at a big birthday party full of family, friends, and kids. Hopefully, she isn't too upset with me for canceling at the last minute...Infertile Phoenixhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11033358612204465661noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3354761566702250657.post-7613459058805341262017-09-11T08:04:39.154-07:002017-09-11T08:04:39.154-07:00yeah kids birthday parties aren't much fun, yo...yeah kids birthday parties aren't much fun, your husband is right! I think you'd have a nicer time visiting your friend and her kid by yourself when there aren't a bunch of other people there anyway. dublinerinDeutschlandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14804856792598440633noreply@blogger.com