And that is how I'm coping during this pandemic.
Now that I am living my life after infertility without children, I know the following:
- I know life disruptions can be devastating. Life does not go as planned. Big plans, little plans, I now count on nothing.
- But I don't let this keep me from living my life. I keep living and planning. I just don't believe plans ever happen until they are actually happening.
- Disease does not discriminate. (Ok, I *knew* this previous to experiencing infertility, but there is no knowing something like going through something.)
- I can be easily motivated by fear. However, I can remain aware of my panicky feelings, but I do not have to act on them.
- There are things I can do to manage my mental health. For me, these things include maintaining a regular sleeping schedule, showering every day, doing something productive or helpful, and organizing, writing lists, or doing something creative no matter how small.
We will get through this.
We don't know what the other side will look like yet, but we will get through this.
Such a good post! Yes, the whole thing about actually KNOWING that disease doesn't discriminate both helps me to accept it (what will be will be), and makes me a little more fearful. Knowing all I can do is breathe and look after myself definitely helps.
ReplyDeleteWonderful post, I love all of this! Especially the showering every day and the regular sleeping schedule. For the first days when we had a local case and then local cases, I slept like crap. Now I sleep a little better, but I need to keep a regular schedule, because that makes things feel a little more...regular.
ReplyDeleteWe were on a walk today and Bryce actually echoed this... he said "I feel like with all we went through with infertility, we know how to make it through bad times. We'll get through this." Gosh I hope so! Unlike fertility, this is something you can plan and to an extent control with social distancing, so there's that.
I don't know what the other side will look like either, and I am trying not to freak out too much. I hope you are well, and safe, and enjoy all the creative things you can do!
Thank you Mali, Thank you Jess!
ReplyDeleteUpdate: I'm not sleeping totally well, I've only been showering every other day, and I sewed just yesterday for the first time in many weeks.
But that's okay! Like it said in an article I read earlier today, "These are not conditions in which to thrive, not for any of us. This is a time to survive." -Ella Dawson
This is a fabulous post, so true! I hope you're doing OK. (I haven't been sleeping that great for a while either. :p )
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