Sunday, February 19, 2017

I Do Not Miss TTC

I do not miss trying to conceive.
That was my first thought when I woke up this morning.

I do not miss charting my cycle. I do not miss taking my temperature every morning. I do not miss trying to time sex. I do not miss recording when we had sex.

I do not miss observing potential signs of pregnancy. (My boobs are extra sore. Does that mean something??)

I do not miss trying to analyze my cervical fluid. (Honestly, I could barely stand to even write that sentence down just now.)

I do not miss questioning everything I eat or drink. (Is sushi okay? Can I have a third beer even though I'm in my two week wait? Am I eating too much sugar? Am I consuming too much dairy? Am I not eating enough leafy greens? Is it okay to have a second cup of coffee?)

I do not miss taking 15 - 20 different vitamins and supplements every day. I do not miss worrying if I am exercising too much or exercising too little.

I do not miss reading TTC boards on the internet. I do not miss reading books that tell me how to conceive. I do not miss people's unhelpful, often hurtful comments and advice when they knew we were trying.

I do not miss going to doctor's appointments. I do not miss having ultrasounds. I do not miss getting my blood drawn. I do not miss injections. I do not miss wondering if bed rest is best or if I should resume normal activity.

I do not miss feeling jealous of every pregnant belly I see in the grocery store. I do not miss wondering how everyone else seemed to succeed while I was repeatedly failing. I do not miss getting my hopes up every time I ovulate. I do not miss crying every time I get my period.

That was a long, lonely, and depressing four years.
I do not miss trying to conceive. At. All.

4 comments:

  1. Oh, I love this post!!! Well said.

    I do not miss the voices in my head telling me I was inadequate! (Okay, they're still there, but they tell me I'm inadequate for different reasons. lol)

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  2. Amen to all of this!

    I don't miss early testing either! :)

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  3. I detested TTC, if I'm honest. Way to make life crap.

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