Wednesday, December 1, 2021

It's Not You

I don't know who needs to hear this, but here you go.

You are not the problem. It's not you.

If anyone judges you for your preference to stay home during a pandemic...
If there's someone who has a way of making you feel unsure, uneasy, or uncomfortable...
Even if your own mother tells you that "everyone has bad things happen to them" after you express your sadness about losing your children, your marriage, and life as you knew it...

It's. Not. You.

Even if everyone at once is opening their traps and forcing their bad opinions on you and you can't help but let some of that noise and bad energy seep in, even then, it's still not you.

Ok, it's me. 
It's me who needs to hear this.
I've been needing to hear this all damn day. So I told myself. And shared it with you.



  1. Sending all my love and a big hug!
    I am sorry you needed to hear this. I wish things were different. But I am also glad you are being kind to yourself ♡.

  2. You're absolutely right, it's not you! These reactions say a lot about the individuals themselves, how compassionate they are, whether they are capable of empathy, or seeing another's perspective, etc.

    Sending hugs.

  3. Thank you!! <3

    Writing this last night really helped me. I told myself "it's not you" several times throughout the day today. It reminded me that 1) it's really not me and 2) I have a lot of support (you all) despite my current experiences. Thank you.

  4. 💜💜💜 I love this mantra. Thank you for sharing!

  5. And also, hugs to you... You are so good at recognizing when you need some extra self-love.

    1. Thank you Jess. <3 I try.

      I didn't like myself for a long time. But I do now. I've learned a lot over the years so I try to share what I've learned.

  6. This is so important!! I'm sorry for whatever you are dealing with or have dealt with along these lines, but your reaction is so healthy. I know it's not black and white though - we conscientious and sensitive folks walk a gray line with this stuff. I myself, after a lifetime of taking too much responsibility for the emotional dysfunctionals of the world, have been on an "Oh no, it's YOU" rampage for the last few years. It's been hard and slow work, but I'm liking the results and my progress very much:-)

    PS - on another note - check your e-mail, I sent you something.

    1. Hahaha, oh yes, "Oh no, it's YOU" is a good way to be. I've taken wayyy too much responsibility over the years for the "emotional dysfunctionals of the world" too. Thanks for giving me this language! In fact, I was even trying to help a pediatric patient the other day by telling his very emotionally intelligent soul, "Just because you see a problem, that doesn't mean it's always your job to fix it." Conscientious and sensitive folks unite! :)