Sunday, November 26, 2017

Facing My Stuff, Part II

I did it. I went to my storage unit. Not just once, but three times!

I opened bins and boxes and sorted through things. I kept some stuff and gave some stuff away. I think I reduced the space I was taking up by a third. And I still need to put some books in boxes so it will all stack and store nicely. That will reduce the space I'm taking up as well.

What once was hard is now so much easier. Getting rid of stuff makes me giddy.

I'm to the point where I'm giving away things I love. Beautiful things. Things I really enjoy. So sometimes it makes me feel better to find good homes for certain things. If I think someone in particular will enjoy something, before I put it in my ever-present give away pile in the living room, I ask him/her if they want it. It makes me happy.

  • My mother-in-law took the large decorative glass jars and patterned plates. 
  • My friend from school who just bought a house with her husband is going to take a large framed print, three small framed prints, and a pair of oversized glass vases. 
  • I'm taking all of the books I bought on infertility that I'm not keeping to the library because I know for a fact that they don't have anything on the topic yet.
  • I'm donating my kids books to a local elementary school in need.

The fact is I just don't need a lot of my stuff anymore. I don't ever want to live in a big house again. Our old place wasn't a mansion by any means, but it was a two-story house with lots of storage. My stuff won't all fit in whatever small place we move to next. And as much as I love it all, I definitely don't want a storage unit for the rest of my life.

So, I'm just keeping my most favorite things. My books. My photo albums. My art supplies. A framed concert poster. An autographed picture. Some prints by my favorite artist.

And giving the rest away.

I continue to be so thankful for this time. I'm thankful I'm not in limbo anymore, and I'm thankful I took a couple of years to grieve and process my experience. I know the exact date that I got completely sick of infertility and decided to redirect my life without my children, but it still took over two and a half years to get to where I am today. 


  1. Well done, Phoenix! I'm so glad to hear that "what once was hard is now so much easier". Wonderful!

    Since we moved this year I think that I have too many things, too. So far I have just been too busy to sort out stuff again... but I eventually will for sure. As I looked through my Christmas decorations that are up in the attic, I realized that I don't need half of it. And it does feel good to give things away, doesn't it? Especially when you know that someone else will be enjoying it :-).

    Wishing you a happy first advent Sunday tomorrow!

    1. Thank you!!

      It feels great to give things away! :) I'm glad I'm not throwing all this stuff away. That would be wasteful. Most everything I have is in new or really good condition. I just don't want it anymore. Don't get me wrong, I'm still keeping lots of stuff: books, art supplies, photo albums. But yes, it feels good to give the rest away.

  2. Two and a half years sounds about right, to be honest. But wow, giving all your things away to downsize sounds terrifying ... but also liberating too. In fact, the more I think about it, the more liberating it feels to me. Brava!

    1. Well, I'm not moving into a tiny house or anything. I still have a lot of stuff! Haha. I just did an incredible (neurotic?) job of saving a lot of things throughout my life. Now that my life is going in a completely different direction, I know I don't need a lot of it. I still have a book addiction though... I'm passing a lot of them on, but I'm still keeping a lot too. I'm determined to have a home library one day.

  3. Two & a half years is not a lot of time in the grand scheme of things. As I often say, we spent our entire lives thinking we'd have children (someday) & building our lives around that "someday." It's impossible to reverse direction & find a new course overnight. Anyway, congratulations on tackling your stuff & finding some good new homes for it! I went through the same thing when we moved 1.5 years ago... and I really haven't missed most of it at all.

    1. Exactly! I remember starting school last year and feeling really overwhelmed and you commented that a couple of years really wasn't much. That was so helpful and I kept coming back to that thought, and here I am one year later already! <3 So, no, two and a half years isn't very long. And yes, I built my life around the assumption I would have kids. So I'm trying to be patient with myself as I regain my footing, energy, and desire to do something else.