I am one week post-final exams and I am just barely starting to feel human again. It's so weird how exhaustion affects me as I've gotten older. Now it can make me feel hungover when I haven't even had a beer. Dizzy, nauseous, unclear thinking, everything is harder than it should be. Weird.
So here I am, sitting in my PJs, feeling thankful for this time to recuperate.
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One of the most common things people say when they learn I don't have kids is, "Oh, you get to travel!" And this statement annoys the crap out of me. First of all, are they paying? Because as far as I know traveling costs money. Even bare bones traveling, you still gotta eat and sleep somewhere. Secondly, just because I don't have kids doesn't mean I don't have a schedule I have to keep. I have two weeks of vacation just like everyone else. Well, at least I will when I get a job after I graduate. But even for now, I have classes to go to and assignments to complete. My life is not a free for all.
But here's the thing. Here's my unpopular opinion. I don't like to travel. Hahaha, joke's on them!
I know that's not the cool thing to say. Most everyone likes to travel. You go to new places, you see and experience new things. And I've been lucky enough to be able to do some traveling throughout my life. I've been to several beaches, ski resorts, music festivals, and big cities. I even went to Europe once.
But I don't really like to travel. I don't like driving long distances or being in airplanes. Packing stresses me out. My body doesn't like eating different food. However, I make myself travel or else I would never see anything or go anywhere. I can be such a homebody haha.
I think part of it is that whole not liking the spaces in between that I wrote about several posts ago. I like being home. I like being at wherever the vacation destination is. The actual traveling part? Not so much.
I don't like to travel, but I also don't want to live here where I live anymore. I mentioned it before, I forget which post, but where I currently live is a great place to raise kids. Lots of resources, lots of activities, lots of community. But I don't feel like there's a lot for ME to do here.
So. What to do, what to do...
Can't have kids.
Don't like to travel.
Don't want to live where I planned on living for the rest of my life.
And that's why I'm moving.
This way I won't have to travel to be somewhere where I want to be.
I'll already be there because I'll live there.
I mentioned my upcoming move in my last post. It will be here so soon. I'm nervous and excited. I've been working toward it for a long time. Oh god the last six years have sucked so bad. That is such an understatement. I am so tired, but I am so close to the end. Or the next beginning.
Firstly, I hope you get to have lots of PJ days and lots of rest too, sounds like it's richly deserved.
ReplyDeleteAs for travelling - I don't always like being in transit myself, but the lure of the final destination is what does it for me. I have 2 trips planned in the next month - one is a 4 hour drive to a remote cottage for a week with the husband to escape from everything and everyone and actually have a peaceful Christmas, for once, away from people inviting themselves over, invites to go other places, demands to drive people here, there & everywhere and so on. The next trip is approx 4.5 hours on a plane in January to the Canary Islands. I must admit, I'm excited about this one, but not looking forward to the whole airplane thing. I hate airports nowadays as it always takes longer for me to clear security due to having bits of metal in my knee (a knee replacement at an early age) and I get a ton of questions asked too. Then my hand luggage is given a thorough search and I get asked questions about my bare minerals make up that apparently looks like liquid (it's powder, and expensive powder at that!) I appreciate it has to be done, but I always feel irked as there's nothing I can show to say I've had a knee replacement that the security will take seriously.
I hope the move goes well, you really do deserve to be cut some slack from what sounds like a very busy/productive time. I look forward to reading all about it!
Thank you!!
DeleteOoh I am excited for both of your trips too! A quiet week at a cottage and then a trip to the Canary Islands sounds awesome!! That is why I have to make myself travel. I don't get to see or experience cool new stuff if I'm at home all the time hahaha.
I've got one more semester of intense coursework before moving. And then... We'll see what happens... I'm excited!! :)
I really like this post, because you know what you want, and what you don't want, and you're arranging your life accordingly. That's all any of us try to do. The idea that people without children all like the same things (ie travel) is so ridiculous!
ReplyDeleteOf course, my husband and I are the classic stereotype (I hate being a stereotype!) of the couple who travel. I seriously wish I could arrange my life to travel more!
Oh, and when I say "travel" I don't necessarily mean long road trips (though I do like road trips if the scenery is interesting) and I DEFINITELY don't mean long flights (not to mention the waiting at the airport, the customs and immigration queues, the taxi/bus/train ride to and from the airport, waiting for bags or to check in, etc etc). Travelling can be uncomfortable and disconcerting and sometimes plain scary.
I think we all have different travel personalities too. Some people like to be doing things all the time and constantly on the go. Depending on what has been going on with me during the year, I love a touring trip, but I also love what I call a "blob" trip, when I can land on the beach and do nothing but drink cocktails and eat tropical fruit and slide into the sea/pool when I'm too hot, and have an afternoon nap, and read books. I think both have their place. But so does relaxing at home, and so I hope you have a peaceful and restorative break cuddled up at home. It sounds pretty good to me!
Thank you so much! I really appreciate the affirmation that I know what I want and what I don't want and that I'm arranging my life accordingly.
DeleteI like both kinds of trip too. I love sightseeing (especially museums) and I really love a lazy beach/reading trip. I'm good at both! Haha
And just because I don't like to travel doesn't mean I'm not going to make myself suck it up so I can come to beautiful New Zealand sometime... :)
I am toasting to your next beginning! I am looking forward to reading about it.
ReplyDeleteThank you!! I've got another round of work to do in school first, but then it will really happen! I don't believe too much in plans anymore. But something will happen! Because I'm not staying here. :)
DeleteAnd like I told Mali above: just because I don't like traveling doesn't mean that I'm not coming to Slovenia. :)))
That's perfect! I love this: "This way I won't have to travel to be somewhere where I want to be. I'll already be there because I'll live there." In fact, I have some friends who think exactly the same way and they live in a gorgeous apartment not far from a lake. I personally wouldn't mind spending a holiday in their apartment because it is so beautiful :-).
ReplyDeleteYou know, I have had a similar "problem" even though I myself like to travel (just not long-distance flights though). My husband doesn't like to fly so much anymore. So that set a limit and I've also had friends say: Oh, but then you get to travel. Maybe because they would have loved to travel but were a bit stuck with small kids, I don't know? Well, there went their "solution" to my childlessness. Couldn't have kids, couldn't travel... so I think I get where you are, at least partly.
In the meantime we have made several trips by train which was lovely. I have been able to persuade my husband to take one short flight last year, too. So it's not all that bad :-).
Moving can be a wonderful new beginning. It has been for us this year. Looking forward to hearing from you about your adventures!
Living in a gorgeous apartment near a lake sounds good to me! :) I would love to live near something beautiful.
DeleteGood point. Other people's "you get to travel" comments are probably them saying what they wish they were doing. Or, more accurately, what they think they would want to be doing. No one knows what they would do in our situation until they're actually in it.
And apparently, a lot of us move!
Thank you. I know the first half of this year is going to fly by. We'll see what the future brings... :)
I get the "oh, you must travel a lot!" comments all the time. We haven't travelled as much as I'd like to... first because my dh is not a good traveller. He's generally fine when we get somewhere, and it's not that he's afraid of flying, but airports & flying almost never fail to put him into a very bad mood. :p Second, because my family lives a 2.5 hour flight & 1 hour drive away, and when I was working, I would generally eat up most if not all of my precious vacation days travelling to see & spend time them, at least once a year. I have never regretted it, but I get a lot of puzzled looks from people who can't fathom why I spent all my time there. Clearly, they either have very bad relationships with their own families, and/or their families all live nearby. Finally, being retired now, we certainly have more time to travel these days... but now we're on a more limited income. Sigh. I do hold out hope, though... ;)
ReplyDeleteAnyway, you are not the only person who doesn't crave travel. I have a childless-not-by-choice friend (former blogger) who has no real desire to travel either. She says she has had enough trauma and loss and "excitement" in her life to last a lifetime, and she is perfectly happy to spend her free time at home with her dh, her cats & her yarn projects around her. Who's to say she's wrong??
Traveling is hard. It's hard on the body and it costs time and money. You just have to know when it's worth it and do it anyway. A 1 hour drive isn't bad to me. I could do that a lot. And the 2.5 hour flight is doable, although I'm really picky and only do direct flights now if possible. No changing planes- I just try to make it as easy on myself as I can.
DeleteAnd your friend is what gives me hope! :) Because that sounds perfect to me. I look forward to being home with my husband, our dog, and doing all of my projects too! And cooking, I look forward to getting back into cooking again. That has been hard for me to do while grieving and then going back to school.
You might want to try a cruise, since it would let you visit interesting places and minimize the stress of travel. There are interesting cruises to Cuba, St. Petersburg or other parts of europe
ReplyDeleteThanks for the idea! I've taken a couple of cruises because that's how my extended family likes to get together every 5 - 10 years. It is a nice way to see different places while still having the same room to return to each night.
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