Sunday, April 8, 2018

Feeling Understood

After a week away from the blogosphere, I finally just got caught up with all the posts I missed. I'm up past my bedtime, but it is so interesting to me how many things are common for us women living life without children after infertility.

I remember being in a very dark place for a very long time, and I greatly appreciated Loribeth's post called A Life Worth Living, because Life IS worth living. I hope anyone reading this who feels the opposite keeps on reading. Read all of Loribeth's posts. Read all of Sarah's posts. Read all of Klara's posts. That's what I did to keep on going, to keep on getting up every morning (or at least by the afternoon). I didn't believe them yet that life could get good again, but at least I felt understood. And reading their blogs gave me something to do while I was in a deep depression and unable to do anything else.

And then, while still catching up from the week, I read Mali's post about the real success stories. Yes!! When I read or hear about a story in the news about someone going through infertility, it always ends with a baby. Just this week I was wondering if I was ever going to hear about a story like mine, a story like the rest of these incredible bloggers I've already mentioned. The true success stories indeed.

It is so interesting to me that while I was buried in schoolwork all week, the infertility-related thoughts that I had here and there were so similar to the blog posts I just read. It reminds me again of how much we all have in common. That I am not alone.

Even Jess wrote about her very rough day today and a similar memory of my own came flooding back.

Oh! And just three weeks ago Elaine wrote a post where I learned how similar our lives have been. Our similarities are almost unbelievable. (Except I don't know German. So I just copy and paste her posts into an online translator to read.)

I am so grateful for this space and I am so grateful for everyone who writes and comments.
We all have so much in common.

Life CAN get good again. And then some days knock you down. And then it gets good again.
I am bored and frustrated with my current city/school situation, but I am so excited for the future.

10 comments:

  1. Indeed, life CAN get good again!
    It is lovely to see your excitement for the future. Wishing you all the best!
    xo
    Klara

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    1. Thank you Klara!! I'm still hoping to travel to Slovenia some day... <3

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  2. You are the epitome of a success story! And I can highly recommend travel to Slovenia too. (I'm going back. One day!)

    The community we have, the support we give and receive, is really important. We're human, and we all have good days and bad days. In the bad days, remember that. We're all with you.

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    1. "In the bad days, remember... we're all with you."

      I will hold this in my heart forever.

      I am only a "success story" because of everyone's support. Living life without children after infertility is hard to put into words, even though I have a blog, ha! I truly do not feel like I would be where I am without everyone who came before me and blogged honestly. I can never thank any of you enough.

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  3. Yes, feeling understood is priceless! I am so grateful for all the brave women who had blogs at the time when I was still unable to express myself. Just reading and knowing that others experienced the same or similar situations was huge. It made me feel less "wrong".

    I went over to Jess' post and actually cried because of all the caring and loving comments. This community is amazing!

    There are good and bad days. But life can be happy and fulfilled again, this is true!

    Sunny greetings across the Atlantic!

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    1. Yes! For so long I was unable to express myself. I did not even know what I was going through myself. How could I convey it to anyone else? I mean, I still do not really know what I am going through. I take each day as it comes. But I know I am not alone. And I know that "life can be happy and fulfilled again." <3 <3 <3

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  4. Yes! Amazing, amazing feeling to have people who "get it," to have this community of support. It sucks that we're all in this boat that we didn't really want to be in, but how lovely to have so many rowers. I'm grateful to you, too! And all the women who make it feel so much less lonely to be childfree not by choice, navigating all the twists and turns of the journey to acceptance. Woo hoo to success stories, and to support!

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    1. I agree, Jess! It definitely makes it feel so much less lonely. I don't know where I'd be in my recovery if I still felt like there wasn't a single person out there who understood what I'd been through, how I felt, and how hard I worked to get to where I am. So so thankful for support.

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  5. Aww, thank you, Phoenix! There will be ups & there will be downs (I just blogged about one today...!) -- but eventually, the ups will prevail and the downs will get further & fewer between. (((hugs)))

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    1. I am so fortunate to already be experiencing longer periods of time in between the down moments and I am so, so thankful for that. I am so grateful for everyone's writing because it helped me process and grieve and begin to move forward when I was spiritually paralyzed. <3

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