I need to slow down, do less, and rest more.
I don't want to maintain the level at which I've been operating. So I'm going to stop. :)
I am going to lower my expectations. For myself and for others.
We cannot all be operating at 100% like everything is normal.
If I am this stressed out and tired, how do my students feel? Their parents? My co-workers?
We are all freaking exhausted.
Yes, my bills still need to get paid. Yes, I need to go to work. Yes, I am thankful for my job.
But no, no, no to most everything else and to anything extra right now. I can't do it. I cannot.
There's already too much to process on a daily basis.
So here's my daily intention for this week:
Wake Up. Show Up. Be compassionate. Give 70%. Go Home.
I woke up early this morning to go grocery shopping before the store got crowded. I didn't really feel like it, but I am so glad I went. Now I have food for the week. I have housing. I have a job.
My basic needs are met.
For this week, I am going to wake up and show up.
But I will not give away all of the energy that I have. I need a lot of it for myself.
Thank you, infertility, for my hard-earned understanding of how to take care of myself.
Here we have to wear mask in shops and trains. There are still some people who do not care about that. sad and angry.... Phoenix, take more care about yourself. You deserve it. I am here with you. :-)
ReplyDeletehope you understand my bad English...:-)
ReplyDeleteYes, I understand! Your English isn't bad. :)
DeleteIt is sad and it makes me angry too. Overall, it's all so exhausting. We will do what we can to take care of ourselves. It's interesting how taking care of ourselves can help others too though. <3
Yes, your last sentence says it all. It takes some time, but infertility certainly helps us to cope with different circumstances. Self-care is so important, and something we often neglect. I'm glad you're taking care of yourself.
ReplyDeleteThank you Mali. I had to remind myself all day yesterday: Do Less. I can't keep going at 100% or even 80%. I will get sick, burn out, or get really really cranky. I've worked too hard to hate my life. The problems of the world are not my fault, nor are they mine to fix. I'll do my job, be a nice person, and take care of myself so I can enjoy the little things. That's the plan for now anyway.
DeleteAbsolutely, yes. 70%. We need to conserve some of our energy for ourselves because this is downright exhausting.
ReplyDeleteYes, we do because, yes, it is. I had to keep reminding myself all week. Thank you for commenting. <3
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