We had a blue moon on August 30th. This phrase is used when we get an additional full moon, and it doesn't happen very often. You've probably heard the phrase "once in a blue moon." Well, I really wanted to do something significant for the blue moon, but I didn't know what.
It figured itself out.
I've been writing about my pediatrics coverage a lot. How it feels different this time even though I've worked with kids for the majority of my career and even since knowing I wouldn't be having kids. How it has felt confusing for me. (And yes, I know those last two sentence were incomplete. I'm using my stylistic license, haha.)
Last Wednesday I got home from work and knew what I needed to do. Last summer I cleaned out boxes and boxes of teaching materials and kids' books. I mailed some to a friend, gave some to my boyfriend's sister, and donated the rest to the thrift store. But I still kept two tubs of things I couldn't bear to part with.
Last Wednesday I admitted to myself that I was never going to use those things. They would be better in someone else's hands where they would be used (as opposed to sitting in a storage tub in my still overcrowded house).
I gave it all away.
I took the best things up to work where they can be used with the kids there. The other stuff is sitting in bags that I will take to the thrift store. And then tonight I was talking to a friend and learned she is homeschooling this year. Her middle daughter is taking algebra and I got really excited. I had several helpful books and resources that I knew would be perfect for her. I ran home real quick to get them, and her daughter gladly took what I had to offer. I love it when I find a perfect new home for things I no longer need.
I could not let go of those things until this week. Now I don't have any materials left from my teaching and pediatric days. I am free and open to continue developing the second half of my career to work with older adults.
I honored my process and celebrated the recent blue moon in a way that was perfect for me.
Dear Phoenix,
ReplyDeleteThis is so nice to read!
I love how you are being true to yourself and your needs, not rushing things. It probably took your pediatrics coverage to realize that you would not use these things again – and that's perfect :-).
Wishing you a lovely Sunday <3
It really did! This three month coverage taught me that I have changed and moved on. I don't judge myself for burning out. I gave it my all for 25 years. Like I told one of my friends, even my own kids would've grown up eventually. It's okay that I want to change directions with my career. And now I've made physical and mental space for whatever comes next.
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